Evidence of a new day!!

“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert". 

Isaiah 43:18-19

 I am so blessed that God has given me the ability to embrace each day -each wonderful miraculous day- that I am given to celebrate my health. Through His grace alone, am I able to focus on today and not harbor bitterness about the many, many yesterdays and all the things that I have missed. Instead, I want to show you what all I am doing to catch up and find my way in this new world. 

Evidence #1:

I'm in school! This is old news, I know but the new news is that I am enrolled in TWO classes on campus this fall!! SOOOO Excited!!!

 Evidence #2

I am driving and it never gets old! Never, ever gets old...I'm telling you! I cry a lot while I am driving because I am soooo happy. Driving is AMAZING! Did you know that?!

 (don't worry I was stuck in traffic when I snapped this!)

Evidence #3

I wrap friends' birthday's presents. I don't just stick them in bag. Why? Because I feel sooo good! I feel like getting all my pretty paper goods out and using them! I am little rusty with my handiwork...

Evidence #4

I took a big step (for me) a few weeks ago and I have decided to try and find a new church to attend. I am so overwhelmed by this process. I am terrified of meeting new people and being sick over the last few years has really done a number on my self-esteem.  So, I decided that I had to face my fears head on. I am visiting churches by myself and forcing myself to speak to new people and try to find a new church home. I took this photo after my first Sunday visiting a new church. 

  

Thank you for your conintued prayers, love and support! I am so overwhelmed by your love not only here but on facebook, polyvore and through email! You all love me such much and I am touched everyday!

Austin Was Amazing

I am home from Austin and wanted to share some photos from my VERY FUN trip!! Austin is an amazing place! I want to move there. :) I always thought New Orleans was my favorite place but Austin is now on top of my "Favorite Places" List. We did stop in New Orleans on our way to Texas, though. I forgot how completely insane Bourbon Street gets at night. (Just in case you were wondering!)

We had dinner in New Orleans at Emeril's restaurant. It was so good. Kim and her roommate Jimmy. Jimmy is a traveling genius. I want him to plan all my vacations...he planned us a great trip. Please note this is the only photo of the 3 of us! :( I always had Jimmy take our photos and never got one with him. I am such a nerd!

 My best friend Kim.

Beautiful view of Austin nature. 

Some very yummy food trucks on South Congress Street. We had cupcakes! They were delicious! 

This photo was taken with my iphone so its color is a little off. We were at a restaurant called Shady Grove. I had the most amazing sandwich in the history of the world! It was called the "hippie chick". Grilled veggies and chicken on some very good bread!  

That amazing "hippie chick". Seriously, doesn't that look great?!

Our itinerary for our final day. I rested the first half of the day so I really did start out until number 6! :) But I still count it as a very successful day!

Our last night in the great city of Austin. I was pretty excited about this photo!

Thank you so much to everyone who sent me well wishes for this trip and prayed for me while I was gone. I am so happy I was able to go! I am so very thankful! 

Because Sometimes Those Silly Cliches Are Really True...even for me!

I hope you are prepared for a WHOLE LOT of HAPPINESS! When is the last time I said that on this blog?! I will admit it has been awhile!

First order of business. School. School is going really, really well. Even though I am still little bummed that I switched my minor to Human Growth & Development that are two really major positive outcomes. The first is that it compliments my Psychology major a lot more that my first minor did and secondly, I can take every single course for my minor online! Hallelujah! I go to campus once a week and observe at an on site daycare for an hour. Some weeks have been difficult but the last couple have been just fine and (drum roll)....I even drove myself the last two times!! Whoo!  I will be signing up for Summer and Fall classes next week. I am taking two online courses this Summer and taking a leap of faith and choosing to take one course on campus for the Fall. I am nervous and very, very excited! 

Secondly, yes I am driving some!!! Seriously, it feels so nice to drive again. I feel like such a carefree teenager when I am able to drive. I even have a "car-tunes" playlist on my iPod just for the special occasions. I only go places close to home. (Like the pharmacy or to get a pedicure.) I am planning to go to the library this week or next. It is about 25 minutes away. I always drive when someone else is at home and has access to a car-just in case I get where I am going and get sick and can't make it back home. Always be prepared.

Okay, this is my biggest and most exciting news!! I am really nervous but so super excited at the same time. I have decided to go with my best friend Kim to Austin, TX, the first week of April. Kim, her roomate and their friend from church will be coming from Maryland during their spring break. They are coming through Alabama and I will ride the rest of the way with them. I am a little nervous because my mind likes to scream at me and remind me of all the horrible things that could go wrong so far from home but then there is another little voice that is like, "Hey, put on your big girl panties! You have been way too sick for way too long to give up an opportunity like this!" Even though the little voice scares me a litttle, I happen to agree with it and I am taking a huge leap of faith and I am going to Austin...like a regular, normal person!! I am so excited!!! 

Sunshine somewhere behind the clouds.

Hello Friends!!

Do you remember me?! How long has it been...

Don't answer that...because it depresses me.

Before I continue, I just want to say that your emails (that I haven't responded to) your beautiful Polyvore sets (that I haven't been able to take in) and your cards and your prayers have really overwhelmed me! You all have been true friends! I drop off the face of the earth -literally- and you all surround me with love and care. I am so thankful for you all!

 

Well, I will try and explain my absence from the internet. My blog, polyvore...the world really. I was completely bed bound the months of November and December. It was a really lonely and very sad time. I became so sick and so weak. It was just really defeating. I am not going to lie. I was so weak and sick that I couldn't even get online. It just wasn't good. I wasn't able to leave home and do our normal family Christmas traditions-which meant my family stayed home with me. My Mom went out of her way to make sure my bedroom was super-duper "Christmasey"! 

 Oh, I also got an iPad! :) Yay! I am hoping the next time I get dressed to go to the doctor, that I will have enough time to do a little video and put on here. 

I am feeling a little better now that I was before the new year. I am taking a new medicine called Plaquenil. It is used to treat RA and Lupus (as well as other things). It has been the first medicine in a long time that has made a slight difference in my symptoms and I am REALLY excited. It helps with my fatigue. (Which is my number 1 symptom). I am now able to move around the house a little bit easier and I don't get as tired when I talk with my family. I can even eat some meals at the table! HUGE! I know that doesn't sound like much but it really is a huge deal.

Also, I am taking my online class at the University! So, so happy about that!! I feel like I am accomplishing something when I am doing school work. I was worried that after nearly 3 years away from school that I would have a hard time getting back in the swing of things but so far it has been good. I have to pace myself because I get really tired after studying but it is so worth it!

I really have a lot that I want to share with you all.

I love you all so much and I really am going to try and update a little more now that I am able! 

And if any of my Polyvore friends are reading this- I CANNOT wait to get back there to you guys! I miss you all so much!!

 

Long overdue: Surgery Results

The last couple of weeks have been crazy. Seriously. Very crazy. I was in the hospital two weeks ago because I had another one! It was not fun. I forget how absolutely terrible hospitals are. 

And last Monday, I had my laparoscopic surgery. The doctor thinks that he may have found what is wrong.

source

When I first saw the pelvic pain specialist that performed my procedure last week, we discussed several possibilities that could be causing my severe pain and those horrible spells that I have. He prepared me for what he expected to find in my abdomen and pelvis during the laproscopic procedure. The doctor believes that I have something called Pelvic Congestion Syndrome. Simply put, Pelvic Congestion is like having varicose veins in your pelvis. Its cause is not known and its treatment is difficult. The doctor marked my abdomen with two big "X's" before surgery, the two points where my pain is the worst during an episode. He said that when he looked in my abdomen, two large, dilated veins connecting to my uterus were directly under the two "X's" he had marked. If those veins weren't directly under those marks, I may not have been as convinced but it was difficult to argue with such a pinpointed find.

I have a DVD and photos from surgery. The photo that he showed me of the dilated veins was amazing. On the left side (where the pain is) the two veins were so large, clearly visible and purple in color versus the right side (where there is no pain), where no veins were visible and all you could see was pink, healthy tissue.

I really didn't want to include a photo because I felt that may be too much information. So, I sort of made a crude example to give you a better idea of what I am talking about.

The good news was that after my previous surgeries from the car accident in 1994, I had very little scar tissue on my left side. My right side was another story. He said that my right side was quite scarred and the right side of my large intestine was covered with scar tissue and slightly connected to my abdominal cavity. He took no action (something we had previously discussed) because he didn't want to cause any problems that I wasn't already having. Which was fine with me. He said that I was at risk for a future bowel obstruction because of the scar tissue and I would have to watch for warning signs but it really isn't something that I have to worry about.

He also found a small amount of endometriosis that he removed. He said that it only takes a teeny tiny amount of endometriosis to cause pain, so hopefully removing it will help. And he also found a small polyp in my uterus that was removed. It may have also contributed to some of my pain. 

So, there were definitely some problems that only surgery could address. I am glad that I was able to have these things looked at and addressed. I was also able to openly and comfortably talk about pain management with my doctor; something that can be very uncomfortable to do. I have found that doctors are not willing to discuss aggressive pain management openly. I understand their caution but sometimes, aggressive treatment is warranted. I appreciated his understanding and willingness to work with me and LISTEN to me. 

I cannot begin to tell you how compassionate this wonderful doctor is.

I have some more things that I want to share about last week and the last few days but I don't want to bore you anymore today! 

Thank you so much for your kindness, love, prayers and support.